Cameron Highlands

Really, I'm feeling alright now. Thanks for the condolences & thoughts. Though I couldn't not think about, hey what if I say "No, I'm not doing fine"...? What then? I wasn't expecting anything from my previous emo post. Though the last thing I need now is sympathy.

Yesterday
• Bid our final farewell to Ah Mah around 10.20am. I finally got the courage to look at her one last time, couldn't step away from her for a long while since I arrived. I just realised that I've not seen Ah Mah w/o her glasses. Now I do! Looking at her frail hands; how it used to shake when she's trying to beckon to someone. She turned frail & weak for years, unable to talk in a normal way anymore. You'll forever be missed!
• Rushed to Cameron Highlands right after with bus. We've decided to put up Michael Jackson's HIStory video up as our first in-ride entertainment (tribute? lol) 2nd in-ride entertainment was Aunties-Uncles karaoke session... I heart my W800 superb capability as a mp3 player in this situation.
• Reached destination almost evening. Not much to see basically except pretty flowers. Very peaceful place, cool lodging. I love the temperature.
• Technician came to set up the karaoke set in the lodge while everyone went pasar malam. Uncle Dennis (who didn't go) couldn't resist singing afew songs himself, later pulled me in to join him for some old English songs.
• Steamboat dinner. Whiskey + lemonade = yum! And again, I forgot what it was. Karaoke session again after dinner. It was actually enjoyable lol. My voice hurts right after.
• Cutting cake ceremony for Poh-Poh. LOTSA photo sessions. I bet Poh-Poh's eyes are blinded with her dear grandchildrens' camerassssss.
• Food just kept continue pouring in. I think I've gained a kg from all these continuous consumption..!
• Rolls around bed in the late night because of boredom *lame*

Outside view of the the lodge's balcony.

Today
• Had a western breakfast in a mamak nearby (part of the package). How interesting. Rushed back to the lodge right after for another brief cutting cake ceremony (phew..) and finally we get to eat the big cake. It was GOOD ♥ Never thought carrot cake would taste this good.
• Checked out around 10.30am. A short stop at the Bharat Tea Farm. Bus ride down was horrible.
• Reached bro's house around 4.30pm +_+
• Dinner with Ash.

Overall I like the place, but it was a boring vacation for me frankly. I wasn't in the mood for social activities ^^; Sorry.

Two blows & indeed, it shattered.

If one would ask me to explain my life in one word, "irony" it is.

In this same time, two sides of my family (mom-dad's) are reuniting here in PJ, mainly from Australia - which is an ultra rare occasion. I'll be seeing my uncles, aunties, cousins from both sides within this short period of time. Both occured for the same reason: my grandma(s). Except, one's to commemorate her 80th birthday, one's to attend her funeral. Both would be taking place at the same day. It just happens.

One of my grandma has left us this early morning. All I can say is, I apologise for not being a good granddaughter; I was never been one to you. Yearsss ago I'd always thought you love teasing me (yeah I'm the youngest & most worthless), giving me frozen, expired chocolates fresh from the fridge whenever I come over, etc., but in the end, you're still my grandma. And what I had mention are only memories now. I'll try harder not to be a worthless granddaughter, I've been trying to. May you rest in peace. All I could do during the first day of funeral today was staring blankly at your photo. I didn't have the courage to walk forward & see you & tell you that I am here, I am afraid I might break when I do.

On another matter, I know some of you guys has been reading or maybe just scrolling through my blog posts. Well just admit it you guys, you're not interested with my daily happenings or what I generally thinks about the ants I just stepped on - except for anything regarding this person we knew. I don't blame your curiosity. Even though I knew how deceiving this person is from the beginning, I've gotta admit I grew fond of him. I'm a mouse who goes for the cheese knowingly it's a trap surrounding it. It's foolish. I couldn't answer specifically WHY and HOW, and frankly, that kinda question is getting silly IMO (lol, a silly question to ask a foolish human, quite a match ya?)

Your natural way of talking just basically shows the intent & the way you've been taking my trust as. Your words, concerns & actions, was it all your natural way of talking as well? By forced courtesy? My thoughts here, it should be entertaining for you. I thank you but I'm not flattered. It might be so because I'm the girl with a blog. Oooh let's see what she blogs about me. Be amused, drama's here. Another thing is, you know how terribly serious I take what people see about what I draw. I don't need to reiterate how sadden I am. My effort & happiness just seems like an entire joke for real now, by just how natural the way you talk. My trust for naught.

In the end, you're not entirely to blame for. It is I who failed to take things with an open mind. Though as I said, I am willing to listen as long you're willing to tell. And I'd take your word for it. I am a simple-minded person afterall. I don't enjoy the act of poking questions. I don't enjoy the feeling of not knowing. I don't enjoy the act of suspicion. I am a person who've been cheated once for my 'simple-minded ness'. Therefore I am paranoid at times. Cheated twice, I am a fool myself. INDEED I AM YES? I smile at my own naivety.

7 Pounds. DMC. Random song pluggin'

7 Pounds thoughts
• It's sad how a tragic accident occurred from merely reading a text message while driving. It's a lesson!
• Where the heck did he get them jellyfishes..
• How the HECK did he manage to fix that vintage machine when noone who specialised in it could do so.. (probably his knowledge in... aeronautics?????)
• How did he manage the tax extensions when he's not even a real tax collector himself.
• Emily has a rare bloodtype, I'm not sure how exactly organ donation works but what are the odds his heart is a match for her RARE bloodtype..
• Ignore the logic & impossibilities, this could be a good emotional movie.
• I loveloveloved The Pursuit of Happyness no matter how corny or untrue ppl might say about it. Oops, off topic...

Detroit Metal City
• I gave this a try since it has an interesting plot: A no-talent pop musician wannabe ends up as a highly idolised death metal god unwillingly.
• Despite its kusoness, I find this anime very very entertaining.
• I can't get the song out of my head..... ugh. It's so... cheerful.


BOWL-CUT HAIRSTYLES GALORE! PEA, YOU GOTTA WATCH THIS LOL
This reminds me, I owe u a Mr.2 gift art...! Forgive me! m(__)m

Cheerful song aside, here's a slow one I just discovered since someone hadn't recommend this to me >_> So I'll HELP MYSELF.



It's like a simple picture, but with a deep allusion & intimacy within it. I'm bad at explaining & might've interpreted the song differently whocares. Damn song made me teared for a moment ;__;

BM Meme Challenge

So I'm joining the bandwagon... fufufu.......

1. Bekas kekasih saya adalah :
Jack Bauer .......... *kena ditembak*

2. Saya sedang mendengar :
Lagu "Marching Bands of Manhattan" (Death Cab for Cutie).

3. Mungkin saya patut:
Pergi berkelah di tepi longkang sorang diri aje. E-eh.. silap, patut siapkan dokumen-dokumen utk visa aku...

4. Saya suka :
Melukis lelaki kacak yg emo, main permainan video, menonton drama Inggeris, membaca cerita hantu dan paranormal, bermimpi siang, minum oat+Milo dgn sudu, buat kerja personal pd waktu tengah malam.

5.Sahabat-sahabat baik saya :
Tidak ramai, tapi amat dihargai.

6.Saya tak paham :
Kenape aku boleh tersuka seseorang yang aku benci pd mulanya, padahal dia mungkin tidak mempunyai perasaan yg sama terhdp aku. Tanya pun cam tak tanya. Ya ke Tidak pun tak kata. Main la teka-teki je.

7.Saya kehilangan :
Inspirasi utk melukis sekali-sekala.

8.Ramai yang berkata :
Saya amat tinggi.

9.Makna nama saya :
"Tiada apa-apa yg istimewa" <--- Ibu yg berkata gitu.

10.Cinta itu adalah :
Sesuatu yg menyakitkan tapi indah.

11.Di suatu tempat, seseorang sedang :
Bermimpi.

12.Saya akan cuba :
Merealisasikan impian-impian aku.

13.Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud :
Sesuatu yg tidak akan mampus walau apa pun.

14.Telefon bimbit saya :
Kadang kadang tutup bila aku tido.

15.Bila saya terjaga dari tidur :
Saya akan turut mengguling kat katil sampai puas hati.

16.Saya paling meluat apabila :
....tiada apa yang spesifik.

17.Pesta/Parti adalah :
Sesuatu yang memenatkan.

18.Haiwan yang paling comel yang saya pernah temui ialah :
Beruang koala.

19.Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan bagi saya ialah :
Waktu sekolah rendah kerana banyak 'drama'.

20.Hari ini :
Istimewa kerana dapat melihat seseorang menanyi secara langsung.

21.Malam ini saya akan :
Buat meme syok sendiri.

22.Esok pula saya akan :
Kerja sambil emo umpama hari Isnin.

23.Saya betul-betul inginkan :
Inspirasi ku utk kembali dan lebih hari yang menarik.

24.Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini :
Ish.... buruk.

25.Pusat membeli-belah atau arked permainan :
Dua-dua pun boleh.

26.Makanan Barat atau Jepun :
Barat.

27.Bilik yang terang atau gelap :
Gelap.

28.Makanan segera adalah :
Sesuatu yg patut dimakan apabila tiada pilihan lain aje.

29.Ayat terakhir yang anda katakan pada seseorang?
"Ooooh tuu...." <--- msn ngan arty

30.Siapa yang anda nak Tag?
Sesiape je la yg nak buat nih.

Is it hello, or just goodbye.

His thoughts, humour, ideas, initiatives, appreciation, manners- it's his presence alone which I adored. He noticed, cared, corrected, taught, inspires, entertains. Of course, there are several bad traits, but that's not my point. In the end, I wasn't anything special, & wasn't expecting anything much. I still remember the book bugs came crawling out when he showed me his DIY journal. I was amazed at the amount of photos, drawings & writings, and a tiny bit disgusted at the same time. Yes, I am reminiscing about my last crush, which I'd known almost 4 years ago. Hardly anyone knows, except a few. Nothing surprising. What happened? Well we barely contact as time goes. Period.


Why the sudden classical plug? Uhm...

BFF. Traumatised. 24. $

It's been a loooong while since the last time I'd seen Ash. Never a dull moment with you again, and I thought it'd be hard to tell you my thoughts, but turned out we actually shared the same situation. It's a mutual understanding we've been sharing for the past xx years. THATSWHYILOVEYOUeventhoughIhatedyouforbeingsuchabusybeetchlol ♥

And a durian seller HAD to ruin my night out by conveying his stupid thoughts to me while blocking the back of my car with his durian truck. I miss durian. But I'm NOT INTERESTED in making friends with a durian seller okaayyy...!!! *traumatised by lameness x9999* Orz (WHY? WHY???)

I'm finally done with 24 season 4! I lovelovelove Tony x Michelle - Didn't know I'm a sucker for sad & romantic relationships. Season 5 next, even though I'd already known few of my favourite characters are gonna be killed off (I spoilt myself) ;__;

Been doing some shopping for the past weeks.
Total # of new loots = 5
(1) Skimmer shoe bronze
(2) Skimmer shoe white
(3) Outdoor shoe
(3) Jeans
(4) Dress
(5) Face powder
Approx. total monies spent = RM510.
What the frigg?! *despair...*

So I kept ignoring the fact that..

It is hard to put up a smile while it bleeds inside. But I have to.

I needed company, even though it might not ease anything. I thank you, and sorry for being selfish. Anything to numb this ache..

Guess I'm tired.